11/3- why?

deep thoughts- why am I here? What is my purpose on Earth, and where do I end up? This is so cliché, I know, but I feel like if I could see a future where I’m happy, I’d work that much harder to get there. And it would make all this daily monotony worth something, you know? I’m getting tired of living a routine, of having to wake up early because of late night procrastination and putting on makeup and going to school, where I memorize facts and spit them back out onto a sheet of paper, and can go through 3 whole class periods without saying a word, of no one noticing me, no one caring, because I’m just a tiny invisible mess and I might be falling apart inside but no one notices and people ignoring me or giving me weird looks and trying not to fall asleep and going home and doing homework and memorizing more junk I’ll forget in a week and never need anyway and what is the point of all this? The only things different about this routine are the books I read and the music I listen to-

  • Never Forget You, by Zara Larsson ft. MNEK. I loved this song from the first phrase, because that starting run is amazing, and I definitely need to listen to more music by the both of them. The music video I thought was a little sad, it kinda has a Beauty and the Beast feeling about it-

  • Just A Fool, by Christina Aguilera ft. Blake Shelton. I feel like this is kind of an old-school song. I mean, it came out a few years ago, but the style of the song is a lot different than current pop music/love songs. I don’t think that even made sense, but ok. This song is great.
  • Lighters, by Bad Meets Evil ft. Bruno Mars. Rap isn’t something I listen to a lot, so I’m always more into the chorus with the featured artist, and I love love love the lyrics to the chorus. But I also like the rap, because it’s about success, and that’s what I want in life.

Just realized these are all features, coincidence I swear.

~the short awkward one


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